Rough Night

I had an extremely rough night, but I prayed a lot and was able to get through it. I wrote a short simple note to my ex, letting her know that I appreciated her honesty about moving on, and thanking her for everything she has helped me achieve. I had to do it to be able to let her go. It's been hard all week thinking there was a chance, but knowing deep down there was very little if any at all. She finally found the strength to tell me that she had moved on, and I had a very hard time with it, and I still do. I prayed and prayed and prayed, and God inspired me to write this simple little letter to her, thanking her, and allowing us both to move on. Her honesty helped me find peace with all that has happened. It's better knowing the truth, no matter how painful it is. I'm going to have to find something to do to occupy my time today, because my mind is a whirlwind right now. She let me know that she and her new friend (a guy) were going to a relay for life event that I had planned on going to tonight, she said she wasn't trying to hurt me, that they had planned it before she knew I was going. I don't know if I can handle seeing her with someone else, but I am going to pray to find the strength to face that fear. I need to go to this event for my own sake, and be with my church, but I don't know if I can take a chance on seeing her with someone else. Talking to her last night helped me realize a lot of things, I'm sorry she moved on, but I understand why she had to. Our relationship wasn't healthy for her in a lot of ways, and she deserves nothing but the best. I hope she finds happiness in every single way. God has blessed this woman in so many ways, and He blessed me by bringing her into my life to help me find Him. I miss her and I love her, but I know why it has to be like this. I just let her know how much she meant to me, and thanked her for being honest, and told her if she ever needed anything, that I was here for her. Just knowing that God has put people like her on this earth to help people like me is a wonderful feeling. Hopefully, I will be able to move on now that I faced this reality of her moving on, it's going to be hard. I definitely don't need to date anyone for a while, but I am so lonely, so I don't know what I should do. I guess I will just pray that God will help fill that loneliness until it's time for me to find someone. I pray that He will give me the strength to get through this, and I'm thankful to have that power back in my life. I don't know what might have happened to me if I hadn't found Him, because I can't imagine going through this without Him. God bless anyone that reads this, and if you even think you have an addiction or aren't doing right for the people you love, please get help before you lose everything. My addictions have caused me to lose everything that's ever meant anything to me, but I have God with me now, and He will show me the way.